Take a moment.
Reflect.
Consider.
Pause.
I hadn’t considered my word for 2013. I wasn’t even planning on having a word. I had other things on my mind. You see, I’ve been busy. Busy juggling. Juggling the Monkey and the holidays, travel to visit family out of state, and Frogs’s extracurricular activities… and so on and so forth. And then a week ago, I had to prepare to go back to work. Technically, I returned from maternity leave at the start of December, but then had several weeks off for the holidays, so a week ago on Friday was my first real day back. I was nervous. In fact, that’s a gross underestimate. I was terrified. MM and I talked and talked, and I had come to the conclusion that I needed to re-evaluate my work-family balance. Working full-time after the arrival of Monkey had become an untenable position.
Much to my own embarrassment, I haven’t known how to handle both. My job involves so much travel and effort that it was exhausting during my pregnancy. Now being away from Monkey for 12 hours is physically and emotionally painful. I’ve been petrified about making it work. How I could make everything fit into place? Sometimes, I think there are times when there just too many pieces for the puzzle of your life, and this was one of those times. So I met with my boss and mentor, and came up with a compromise. I’m starting to work part time, and Monkey gets to stay at home with me, rather than going to daycare. (As a complete aside, what is wrong with this country– why is it so hard to find good quality, affordable infant child care?! Why should I have to be on a waiting list that rivals the heart transplant list to get Monkey into a good place?)
I left that meeting with a huge sense of relief. It was all going to work out. Sure, I was going to have to give up some aspects of my job. We also set a high benchmark to demonstrate that working from home, part time was beneficial for everyone involved. However, I felt confident that this would work for me, Monkey and my job. I was going to get all of those pieces to fit into place!
Then there was the drive home. It’s a bit of a commute, and the entire time, I was mulling things over in my head. Initially I was elated. I was going to get to stay home with Monkey AND work! I could be more involved with my children and further my career. It felt really good. However, as the miles went by, the doubt and anxiety began to creep in. I’ve always worked or been in school. I didn’t take a day off after graduating from college and starting work. I only took 3 days off between leaving work and starting graduate school, and that was to move across country. I only took two weeks completely off when Frog was born. I’ve worked HARD for my career. I’ve earned a terminal degree in a field that I love. It felt so odd to give up even a piece of that world.
The next day, I was driving Frog to his swim practice, and this quote was up on a church billboard as I drove past:
I don’t normally pay much attention to the signage, but for some reason, this quote struck me to the core. Perhaps, I wasn’t ending my career. Maybe this was just a pause, a healthy pause, one that I need very much. Perhaps, if I take this pause, and trust that even though I can’t see how the puzzle is going to turn out, that God has a plan in mind. So I’ve decided that I’m going to take a deep breath and enjoy my time sitting at this comma.
With that resolution in mind, I have created my first printable with my quote of the year. You can download the printable for yourself
Sharing this printable here:
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- Under the Table and Dreaming: The Sunday Showcase
23 years ago I left the working world and started my own business to stay home with our baby. It was the best decision for all of us. The first 10 years I worked from home, then moved the business a few minutes down the road. My son loved being home and a few hours of daycare as a toddler was “playing with friends.” Through school, I could adjust my schedule and be there for him for everything. Now that he’s away at college, I can look back and love the wonderful life we all created as well as be thankful the job I created for myself to stay at home has helped support us for all these years. Just go for it and God will provide the right path. Congrats on your decision!
Thank you for your words of wisdom. I greatly appreciate it. I’m looking forward to the time ahead of us!
What a beautiful printable. Thank you so much!
I love, love, love this! I’m struggling, too, with returning to work in March with Bubs being only 7 months old. Thankfully I have excellent child care in place because working from home is not an option for me. Thanks for posting and for the download…..visiting from Nifty Thrifty Things Link Party
Good luck. It seems mothers always feel torn and split. Glad you liked it!
I love that saying! I am a new follower! I found your link on Flamingo Toes. I would love for you to link up to my weekly linky party Fluster Muster on Wednesday’s @ http://www.FlusterBuster.com.
Thanks so much… I will check out your linky party.
New fan and follower! I love this! I shared on my FB page “The Joys of Home Educating”
Thanks!
Thanks for the follow! Hope you enjoy!
Great quote!
Thanks for stopping by!
This is beautiful! I look at motherhood and the different seasons of our lives as being ordained by God. We can’t always see the path but we can only be present for what we acknowledge. I’ve been a full time working mom, a part timer who took my kid to work, a stay at home mom and a homeschooling mom now for 19 years. I never ever thought that would be my life’s work, but God had a surprise in store for me, and I wouldn’t trade it for it for the world! We’ve done without, made do, scrounged, begged and pleaded and somehow it worked out the way God intended it. I say this to encourage you to just be present wherever God has put you.
You visited my blog and left a sweet comment. I hope my words will encourage you today!
Blessings,
Marty@Marty’s Musings
Beautiful. I definitely needed to see this tonight. Thank you.
Thanks!
Amen! Just pinned this!
Thanks so much for stopping by!
found you via take a look tuesday….. i will definitely be pinning and using this quote somewhere. it’s awesome and the graphics are very well done. as far as your post…. i can definitely relate. my youngest came along 13 years ago and we decided my career should go to part-time. i can’t say it’s all been busy and that it hasn’t been complicated, but i don’t regret one minute of it. i’m still working part-time, juggling a professional job and homeschooling a middle-schooler….working odd hours and from home when needed… you can’t have it all, but you CAN figure out what is the most important thing in your life and strive to make that the priority. good luck to you and thanks for the post. cheering you on in north carolina….
Thanks for the words of inspiration and support! I can’t imagine working and homeschooling. That’s quite a feat!
I love that saying!! I had to re-read it a couple times before it hit me, WOW! Love it.
Thanks for stopping by!